Descansos

I have come across an article that has made me think a little differently about what might have gone through the minds of the women who came to the place Jesus received burial.

I invite you to imagine a tragic scene today. We seem them in many places as we drive. We see a roadside cross, bouquets of flowers, perhaps some candles, a stuffed animal or a jersey from the local high school. Sometimes there is a hand-painted placard with a name and a date.  You drive by and get a mere glance, but you know there was a moment on this highway when something horrific happened and a person or persons lost their lives.

Unfortunately, highway deaths and roadside memorials (sometimes called descansos from a Spanish word meaning "to rest") have become so common that some states are seeking alternatives.

Joyce Keeler knows the pain of losing a loved one in a tragic automobile accident. Nearly 30 years ago, her son lost his life on a rural road in Delaware. For Joyce, driving by the site of the accident is still too painful. She avoids it, even all these years later. Instead, Joyce goes to the Delaware Highway Memorial Garden at the Smyrna Rest Area near her home. Among the trees, shrubs and flowering plants, is a pathway lined with memorial bricks that bear the names of those who have lost their lives on the roads of Delaware. In the center of the garden is a pond with goldfish, frogs, water lilies and a gurgling waterfall. Tucked amid the busyness of nearby highways U.S. 13 and Delaware 1, it is a peaceful place to remember and reflect. To honor the memory of her son, Joyce sits quietly near the brick that bears his name.

Patrick Bowers, whose 21-year-old son died in a crash in 2008, also frequents the Delaware Highway Memorial Garden. "It's not morbid or gloomy, not like a feeling you can get at a cemetery," he says. "It's a garden like someone would do in their backyard." Delaware is one of several states providing alternatives to roadside memorials because traffic safety officers worry they are a dangerous distraction to drivers, and put those who maintain them in harm's way. In most states, descansos are illegal, but officials rarely enforce those laws. Several states have implemented sign programs that offer a safer option to mark the site of a crash. Others have adopted laws limiting the time a memorial they will allow it to remain on the side of the road. Still others offer to plant memorial trees at the sites of fatal accidents. Joyce Keeler much prefers the garden to the roadside memorial. "Things like that get old, and the flowers fade," she says. "But this will never go away."

 

The women who went to the tomb to memorialize a tragic event, the crucifixion of the innocent man, Jesus of Nazareth, are part of a feeling we have not to forget the person who experienced the tragedy. To memorialize Jesus, one might go to the tomb. One might go to the place of his crucifixion. You might go to Nazareth or Bethlehem. You might go to Galilee and the place of great sermons, healings, or exorcisms. After all, the Jewish people had a long tradition of offering such memorials. Jacob erected a memorial in Genesis 28. Joshua memorialized the crossing of the Jordan in Joshua 3-4.

Of course, with the death of Jesus, we may need to re-think what it means to memorialize his life.